NPCs of Sila
This page documents all the totally adorable characters who weren’t quite good enough to be accepted into the Adventurer’s Guild. Many of these would be strong candidates to be trained into Trained NPCs, if you were so inclined.
Lady Evelyn of Pembenton (Garibaldi’s voyage, written by James M, Dec. 2016) – Half-orc 14 5 10 8 14 12, LG. Lady Evelyn agreed to join the great adventurer to Silanya on a provisional basis, mainly to keep an eye on her nemesis Niar Osemar, who has absconded to Sila after stealing the heart of Evelyn’s betrothed. Unwilling (and possibly unable, the paperwork involved in this strange new land is immensely vexing) to establish a knightly manor as a sign of her long-term commitment to stay, she has rented room at the Winter Wolf Inn and is currently living off of funds while she surveys the town. Her offer to assist the watch by commanding the common riffraff they have manning the wall was politely turned down after Fior fished Evelyn out of the harbor s(he insisted her temporary loss of grace was due to her sea legs).
Niar Osemar (Garibaldi’s voyage OR’ed with a stat block rolled to replace the awesome character James E lost the paperwork for…Niar was going to be Del’s bard 1 character at the dawn of Silanya, a draw bard with much better stats than Sovan [but not this good, let’s be real], written by Del, Dec 2016) – Drow 12 17 13 13 14 19, N. Niar came to Silanya to ditch her massive, massive debts. She isn’t aware that Lady Evelyn considers her to be her nemesis, as she didn’t notice that she had seduced Lady Evelyn’s beloved (and was leading a life too fly to bother, TBH). She now tends the Horses of Sila, because she’s obsessed with the horses, and sings weird drow music to herself that no-one’s into. She’s attracted several local songbirds, which seem to enjoy harmonizing with her (she’s that charismatic).
Jean-Antoine Misérables Du Voir et la Grandissement Chiens aux Sacrix pour le Reconnaissance Verts dans le Metiers devant ou Tous Les Mondes et Apparatif Sous-chous sont Vraiment Exquitisse du Provence Provençe avec Les Autres Personnes d’Interêtes dans les Champagnes Stella autour Grenadiers-Trevanche sous Marie-Terre-Pied-Soleil des Lines Anciennes et un Petite Chose Quelqu’un Ne Pas Plus Dire
(Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) — Hill dwarf 9 8 9 15 12 13, LN. Jean-Antoine is the pre-eminent living scion of one of the most storied dwarven lineages to survive the Corruption, although their lineage doesn’t figure in current power structures and their habits are significantly out of step with modern times. As a public philosopher, they have come to Sila to revel in the glories of the past, to help ensure that the new colony reclaims the shining parts of imperial culture abandoned in the sad squalid scrambling that the first century of establishing our present culture on the home continent made necessary. Installing themself in the Insufferable Human, they have taken to holding forth on the evils of the nobility, the decadence of pants, and the virtues of the (probably apocryphal) philosopher-bureaucrats of the Old Empire.
Mayor Adel Noirbonne (Jean-Lee’s voyage, written by James M, June 2017) – Half-elf 6 16 9 10 12 16, LG. Adel is charming, funny, an excellent dancer, and an amazing friend. So how they ended up as the (elected) mayor of Sila is not surprising to anyone except them. Now they can’t tell if they’re in over their head or in a job that doesn’t really do anything, because between the military command of Fior and busybodies like Madison, there’s not a lot that’s obviously their responsibility. But they’re going to darn well try!
Melina Istvail (Oscar Meyers’ voyage, written by James M, Aug. 2017) – Half-elf 9 13 6 7 7 14, CN. Melina is the new head of the Docks in Sila, handling all the import / export concerns for the new colony on behalf of the Silver Fleet, and she is hopelessly lost. Always the flighty socialite, her family sent her to Sila to get her away from yet ANOTHER dalliance gone horribly wrong. She only agreed because she’d heard tales of the brave heroes of Sila, and wanted to meet them…but her busy work calendar is preventing her from partaking in the meager, randomly timed social scene here! It’s an outrage! An outrage she says! That being said, she’s petrified she’s going to muff the delivery schedule of the grain + materiel shipments, and she really, really doesn’t want to know what happens if the colony ever runs out of healing potions. So…that can all wait until she’s gotten a better handle on things.
Grundar Svellson of the Knotted Crags (<bugle>’s voyage, written by James M, Oct. 2016) – Mountain Dwarf 14 10 18 15 13 11, LN, fighter 1. The newest sergeant of the wall patrol / city watch, Grundar Svellson volunteered to join the military mission here, drawn by the generous pension and danger pay. After a few weeks here, he’s radically revised his former hard-charging nature (after seeing the sergeant who he was replacing get torn apart by faeries just two days before his boat home), and has rebuffed several overtures by Guildmaster Fior to join the Adventurer’s Guild (or, as he calls them, “The Local Madhouse”). He signed up for a generous pension, dammit, and he’s going to survive the full decade it takes to draw it even if he has to wear splint mail to bed every day of the term. [David rolled stats in a block of 5 and one of the rolls after the roll that became Bugle would have been good enough to be an adventurer. This is the result.]
Kimberly Flowers Human, has the Alert feat (Came over with Camille de la Fleur du Plusieurs de la Lumière et du Noir, written by James M, July 2017) – Human 12 8 10 12 5 12, NE, Alert Feat. Corporal Kimberly Flowers is a member of the wall patrol…and only the wall patrol. Unlike most of the other military personnel in Sila, she’s been assigned to permanent wall duty, owing to her unique combination of keen reflexes and atrocious judgement (she once responded to a noise complaint by setting a house on fire). Despite her tendency to over-use force to ‘keep the rabble in line,’ she’s a pleasant enough conversationalist, dedicated royalist, and overall interesting companion to spend time on the wall with, with an uncanny ability to react to a returning adventuring party while fully immersed in all manner of technically prohibited on-duty activities (gambling, drinking, story-telling, hair-braiding, fist-fights, inappropriate interactions with subordinates, you name it).<rolling> (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) – Kenku 11 17 9 12 6 11, LN. The second Kenku to come to this continent, <rolling> is an unusual kenku. His flock, The City Guard of Rean have been public for over a century, and they are known to be trustworthy and without ulterior motive. He was recently transferred to Sila to be a personal guard to Commander Fior, but after a few slightly overzealous defense reactions to adventurers approaching her person, his keen shortbow skills have been reassigned to wall duty until further notice (even though neither Raevori nor Valerian complained).
Madison Lervonar (Aa’li’naa Aurae’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – Half-elf 7 10 5 13 12 16, LN. Madison is a consumptively skinny half-elf who enjoys the indoors, mathematical calculations, and double entry accounting. He is a clerk for the local mission, usually reporting to Guildmaster Fior, and undertakes entry of the expedition logs into the official record. Having recently come to this job, he’s started butting heads with Tobias the Scholar, who maintains his own parallel copy of the logs (and who Madison had to quarrel with in the process of copying them into the official state-sanctioned record).
Gerhardt von Hassenratz (Syathir and Saoirse’s voyage, January 2017) – CG Tiefling (8 7 7 11 12 16) Social Director of the Silanyan Guild. Brought in after a wave of protests (mostly sarcastic) about the Guild’s lack of amenities and exciting nightlife, Gerhardt organizes poorly attended but lavishly prepared pub nights, dances, trivia contests (with a lifelong ban for Raevori after she took over the contest, corrected the questions, and disqualified several contestants for being ‘fatuous’) and assorted soirees. He’s a firm believer that the family that plays together, slays together. And if he has to dress up in silly costumes, smile like he means it and play a surprisingly intense game of touch rugby with the troops to earn their respect and love, he will do whatever it takes to improve their mood – by hook or by crook. WHETHER THEY LIKE IT OR NOT.
Ioane Aquios (Trained by Samuel Fehler in the way of the Sunfish) – Human 6 / 7 / 10 / 14 / 9 / 12, the current leader of the Church of the Sunfish after Samuel’s death. Unlike Samuel, Ioane seems to be quite aware that the sunfish is not a god but an aberrant blight on the world. However, Ioane believes in the future that the Sunfish showed Sam. He does not want the good of all life to be fed to some plane-faring arch-aberration. Instead, he believes that the aboleth ritual will separate the good in all of us from the evil in all of us, at which point the gods will intervene and channel the good into the heavens before the aberration can feed. The gods, in their wisdom, will then cut this planet off from the heavens and all our evil will be trapped here to fester and die.
Tobias the Scholar (Raevori/Finnigan’s voyage, written by James M, Oct. 2016) – Human 6 7 4 15 14 14, a burgeoning scholar of all these lands’ curiosities, and a common collaborator with Leshanna before her death. Trustee of the Leshanna Memorial Fund for Adventurer Greatness. He maintains a parallel set of the official adventuring logs, with supplemental information for young adventurers to peruse. Given the lack of bureaucracy, his copies are often the ones examined by newly arrived adventurers.
Calliope Matthews (Syathir and Saoirse’s voyage, January 2017) – LE Human (7 6 7 15 16 6) Sila’s head of local legal aid; that is to way, the Colony’s one public defender. Sila’s extraterritorial status means that its legal system is uncertain and full of headaches for visitors and residents alike. In Calliope’s opinion (and in her advertising) “Just because Commander Fior is, at present, de facto Judge and Jury for a vastly simplified pseudo-military tribunal doesn’t mean that you should feel like she is!” Calliope does a brisk trade in merchants seeking import licenses and minor torts, and is extraordinarily careful to footnote all her documentation – and all her billing – with a caveat that she has no official status and likely cannot materially assist any clients who come to her for assistance. The amount of billable hours she clears for passing notes from worried petitioners to Fior and in no way changing her mind or affecting the outcome does to some extent help her sleep at night. On top of beautiful furs. Surrounded by attentive servants.
Gladys Cooper (Syathir and Saoirse’s voyage, January 2017) – NG Half Elf (11 10 4 16 5 6) Scored highest in her class on her exit exams from Teacher’s College and had first pick of placement. Making the mistake of consulting her human mother, whose prime concern was with having a ‘political’ and ‘exotic’ daughter to show off to the (mostly High Elven) neighbourhood, Gladys was bullied (as she is always bullied) into taking Sila Port Charter School, a one-room schoolhouse with sparse attendance and no resources – except when Sila’s Truancy Officers force every half-literate child between 2 and 19 into her single schoolroom. Her fears now include children, parents, loud noises, awkward silences, loneliness, crowding, chalk dust up the nose, mispronounced poetry, serious risk of bodily harm and marking. In this she is likely no worse off than most first-year teachers, but this fact is of little comfort to our heroine. She is beginning to fear her own shadow. (She stands so very often in other peoples’.)
Jebediah Clanless (Aa’li’naa Aurae’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – Dragonborn 12 9 10 11 13 8, CE. Jebediah is a quietly tragic figure. The product of the union between a chromatic and metallic dragonborn, he hatched with thin, vaguely translucent scales, giving his body a dirty browny-pink color. Abandoned at hatching, he was raised by a strict religious group (still unidentified by him, but whose imprint left an unmistakable dislike for authority figures, clerics, paladins, and the various servants and representatives of the gods). A subdued, cynical person, he runs Sila’s first architecture practice, bringing first principles and hands-on experience in a contractor sort of way to try to straighten out the shoddy construction that so many of the new immigrants live in.
Oona Thorvaldsdottir (Syathir and Saoirse’s voyage, January 2017) – NG Half-Orc (18 11 12 6 13 8) 24th Hereditary Master of the Scented River Clan. Tasked with digging out the sanitation system for Sila, she is enthusiastic, friendly, unbelievably strong and completely content to be very good at what she does and almost entirely ignorant of anything else. She is a master sewer builder, as was Thorvald Ingridsson before her and Ingrid Eiriksdottir before him; like all in her clan, she won the right to lead in the traditional, ancient and honourable duel to build the fastest and most perfect septic tank on the Field of Stones and Obstacles, out back of the hay barn on their estate. That her mother was a travelling human saleswoman who’s only visited twice – to conceive Oona and to drop her off – has never been held against her. And any snide comments about her line of work bounce off her sunny disposition and enviable shoulders – this is a dirty world full of terrible problems, and her job is to make sure some of them flush away in a timely fashion.
Michaelis Goldenleaf (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Elf 7 16 9 7 15 6, a sanitation engineer happily helping to keep Sila’s toilets flowing to where they need to flow. Always an odd egg in a family full of canopy-loving wood elves, Michaelis loved burrowing underground and befriending various worms. He is happy to be Sila’s sole sewer specialist and spends his days slipping expertly down manhole covers (which he has to get Oona to lift for him) as well as waxing poetic about plunger designs to anyone who will listen (sadly, not very many).
Leaf Sky (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Firbolg 12 7 9 11 18 9. Sila’s only therapist. Despite her imposing stature, there’s something about Leaf that makes you want to curl up on the squishy couch in her office and tell her all your troubles. She was rather taken aback by the high incidence of PTSD among the adventurers’ guild, but has resolved to hear each of them out at full length. She has not quite accurately estimated how much time this might take. At present she is only booking appointments five years out – make that five years two months – make that – her calendar is very full, please leave a message.
Yargug (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Orc 14 12 16 11 4 8. Yargug is proud to be Sila’s only medic. Having graduated from the Very Real Medical School For Real Doctors Yes (VRMSFRDY) with full honours, she is confident in her abilities in physiotherapy, epidemiology, and neurosurgery as well as every single other area of modern medicine. The fact that she seems to keep making her patients sicker is baffling to her, as she tried that prescription just yesterday on herself and she feels strong as an ox, thank you very much. Yargug does not despair, however; each new day is a new day, and each new patient is an exciting new bag of organs to fiddle with. No one has told her what “informed consent” is yet.
Merchants and Large Business Owners
Betty Cooper (Prem (Lil P) Belzaphir’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – Human 9 8 6 16 13 12, CG. A woman of means just now entering middle age, Betty Cooper decided to oversee her ambitious shipping business from this side of the sea, as a way to establish herself in this new land and possibly establish herself as a noble so she could pass on a title as well as a fortune to her beloved children. Additionally, being a continent away means that they’ll finally have time to grow into themselves unsupervised. They are bright teenagers, but they had a tendency to hide behind mummy’s skirts when their youthful enthusiasm got them in trouble. She has taken up lodging at the Winter Wolf Inn temporarily as she gets the lay of the land and decides where to build her estate.
Derrick the Merchant (Raevori/Finnigan’s voyage, written by Geoff, Oct. 2016) – Halfling 7 18 13 5 6 14. Derrick decided that embarking on a dangerous voyage and setting up a shop in a far-off land would be a great idea. He is currently the reigning darts champion in the Winter Wolf Inn, and the manager of the Leshanna Memorial Fund for Adventurer Greatness. He also deals in fine beadwork and other intricate craftworks.
Robert Blackhall (Rock’s voyage, written by James M, Nov. 2016) – Tiefling 9 12 9 12 10 15, LG. A proud, upstanding member of the community, Robert Blackhall paid his own way to Silanya to establish his own small timber business in the woods inside the wall. Since he’s arrived, he’s become increasingly appalled by the town’s lack of leadership and forward thinking, and is working feverishly to convince the Home Continent to send skilled engineers, doctors, and tradespeople to help reduce the rate of dock worker and other laborer fatalities. His pleas have been falling on deaf ears among the local leadership thus far, and he worries that this rugged land is reverting to old superstitions about those carrying demon blood after the tragic descent of Bertholdt Rohrbach.
Saelltha Pravonest (Prem (Lil P) Belzaphir’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – High Elf 13 11 8 15 10 14, CG. As a second century gift to herself, Saelltha decided to jaunt over to Silanya and establish an inn, called the Insufferable Human. Her longsword hanging on the back of the bar, she is both bartender, bouncer, and overall proprietor, pushing the elven lack of need for sleep to its limits. Her mending cantrip served her well in throwing together the facility, and she looks forward to being able to expand her guest quarters into a proper building from the well appointed selection of elven tents that it is now (many new immigrants put very little thought into their lodging situation on the new continent — not Saelltha).
Francine-Jean du Là. (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) – Mountain Dwarf 15 12 11 9 8 11, LE. Francine-Jean is a skilled weaponsmith, Silanya’s first resident such (apart from the adventurers). She relocated her successful practice her to supply the Watch with swords, crossbows, hidden daggers, and much more as part of Fior’s ongoing efforts to increase the colony’s financial viability. For Francine-Jean, it was a massive step down in her scale of business, as her prior work in the Dominion of Coruscare was quite large, but it was a way to finally shake the cloud of her ancestor’s shame once and for all. In a land where the most powerful dwarf is a mere Jean-Pierre du Veyrir de la Grand Contumace Saint-Emilion, perhaps a completely stripped family name will no longer draw wayward eyes, her great-grandmother’s heinous accounting fraud will no longer cloud her social prospects, and the knot of hatred she’s been winding all eight decades of her life will ease.
Tradespeople and Small Business Owners
Otto Black (Prem (Lil P) Belzaphir’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – Mountain Dwarf 10 9 8 8 4 10, N. Otto was raised by unconscionably fashionable parents in the thriving metropolis of Overmountain, who insisted on giving him a fashionable pair of human names. After a rather difficult several decade dwarven childhood, he moved to the nearby human dominated small town of Bookins (home of the Merryweathers, as chance would have it). He was busy being a cobbler, though, so he’s never heard of the Merryweathers or their encyclopedia. After his high culture shoe business failed, he decided to up sticks and come to SIlanya. He fully intends to bring fashionable footwear to this benighted backwater.
Sherwood “Shemp” McCracken (Syathir and Saoirse’s voyage, January 2017) – TN Human (8 11 16 4 7 10) The Butcher of Sila. Note that this is not an impressive title – he’s just the guy who cuts up the larger animals for consumption on those rare occasions when one can be spared or shuffles off this mortal coil on its own terms. This happens so infrequently in the colony as it is currently run that Shemp is beginning to think his plan to ‘get in early and corner the meat market’ in a fish and cabbage-based economy might not have been the stroke of genius he thought it was. If only more people wanted to share a beer with a semi-employed butcher in a town full of dashing heroes…and if only his job hadn’t left him with forearms scarred to the consistency of dried jerky and a permanent smell of offal…and if only he was better at remembering which cut any given customer had asked for…or whether they’d even paid him…such is the refrain of the mournful but indefatigable Shemp.
Erica Porter (Morgan Wheeler and Tabitha Loress’ voyage, written by James M, July 2017) – Human 12 10 8 4 10 5, LN, Tavern Brawler feat. Erica scrimped and saved her pennies from long years of prize-fighting in taverns all over the mainland for one purpose: to start her own place. Tragically, a recent pair of illegal brass knuckles crushed her ribcage [-6 Con; the dice deleted a 14!], and so she has to settle for buying into someone else’s. Now she’s the new bouncer / shareholder / proprietor of the Winter Wolf Tavern, and she’ll be darned if this historic place starts going down the tubes just because the competition is run by a prig of an elf [Insufferable human] or a cleric with a gimmick [The Fallen].
Aspen Foldingway (Melora’s voyage, Nov 2016, written by James M) – Forest Gnome 10 10 7 12 11 9, N. A proper gnome’s gnome, Aspen spends his days surveying the trees of the forest within-the-wall, trying to identify trees that will be least disruptive to the local ecosystem when removed. He’s already used his talent for squirrel whispering to find (and dispatch) a few cases of woodblight. Despite his fragile health, he has a deep and abiding love of the outdoors, and hopes to not be driven inside when the snows come.
Ellevia Horaesthil (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) – High Elf 12 7 7 11 13 12, CN. Ellevia is a glass shaper, forger of fine confections of light and beauty out of base sand using nothing but her own two hands and magic. Bolder by far than most in her isolated enclave, she seized the opportunity to return to the wellspring of her craft, hoping that the land of her ancestors would inspire her to overcome the failures that plagued her when she was trapped in that stultifyingly dull place. Sadly, she hasn’t met with much success, as her delicate creations crash apart somewhere in the fabrication process. She blames the Wall (and has written many poems cursing it which she’s shared with no-one), claiming that it traps her in the toxic energy flow of the homeland, and aspires to one day forge glass from the pure sand deep in the unclaimed lands. In the mean time, she lives modestly, relying on her magical gifts to help maintain her garden in an isolated patch of the forest-behind-the-wall.Asssre Undgerrrde (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) — Kobold 3 15 12 11 9 7, LE. Assssre is the richest kobold in the world. That’s not saying much, of course. Due to ancient prejudices, very few of her people escaped the Corruption. There are only three clans, each boasting scarcely a battletalon’s worth of members. As the wealthiest kobold (with a surprisingly successful haberdashery), she volunteered to represent her people in this bold new land, but her native timidity has prevented her from so much as speaking to a member of the Guild yet (even the few who’ve purchased hats from her), let alone contemplate going outside the wall. That’s all for the best. She’s not well suited for the adventuring life, since she stands scarcely 2’6” with the native strength of a human 3 year old…actually that’s a lie. She’s been pinned by a three year old before. Several times, in fact. The hats she makes are quite delicate.
Edward Verres (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) – Human (featless) 11 9 7 7 12 13, N. Edward is a charming, quiet man, soft spoken and ready to listen (and listen again, if he didn’t understand it the first time). This more than makes up for his vague indifference to the art of baking, and has allowed him to rapidly cultivate a large circle of friends. Although he often oversleeps after the strain of talking with friends for a few hours, and so his bread isn’t ready until lunch, Sila’s resident baker is a popular man, and gossip has already started to swirl about whether or not he’s ready to settle down and start a family.
Illia Forgehammer (Prem (Lil P) Belzaphir’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – Mountain Dwarf 11 14 8 11 11 12, LG. Illia is a traditional dwarf in a lot of ways. He loves fine wrought ironwork, is a stout defender of justice, fairness, and law, and can throw an axe with the best of him. But, he also changed his given name to one of elvish stock, can’t handle his liquor, and became a professional dancer. Having trouble finding his niche on the home continent, he’s determined to be Sila’s finest (and first) exotic dancer.
Keshev the Claw (Syathir and Saoirse’s voyage, January 2017) – LN Red Dragonborn (15 13 6 12 11 12) A professional wrestler, bon vivant and minor celebrity back Home, visiting Sila as a charity event to entertain the new colonists. Currently suffering from extensive internal injuries after a drunken attempt to fire her breath weapon resulted in a full closed-mouth detonation during an altercation at a tea house near Town Hall. Details remain unknown but a previously quite friendly game of whist was interrupted in the process. Keshev knows she’s risking her endorsements, her health, her fortune – but she cannot, cannot abandon this duel of honour. She roams the town, therefore, incomprehensibly asking after her attacker in all her wired-jaw toothy Draconic splendor. Keshev also seems to be up for the long haul – when last asked for tax purposes what her profession was, Keshev ticked the little-used box for ‘Avenger – Impromptu / Vigilante.’
Jimbo Elkthorn (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Human 9 7 10 8 11 13. Jimbo is a member of the Seven Deadly Sins, a tragic thespian troupe known for putting on dramatically unsatisfying plays where all the main characters die in the first act before they have had any significant character development. Jimbo is the leading man and romantic hero in every play and usually averages about four whole lines before his grisly death scene. In his spare time, Jimbo practises tap dancing. He hopes to one day be good enough to convince Jarlsberg to put on a musical with him as leading man, romantic hero, AND principal dancer, and to be able to dance for a whole two verses without dying.
Jameselina Epsclaw (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Human 12 10 5 11 8 9. Jameselina (or “Jimelina” to her friends) is a member of the Seven Deadly Sins. She performs all the troupe’s stunts, or would if she didn’t have to miss every other performance due to the steady succession of colds which seem to plague her. Her voice is perpetually nasal. As a result, Jarslberg makes her mouth all her lines while he recites them from the wings.
Jimothy Michel (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Human 7 10 7 8 6 10. Jimothy is a member of the Seven Deadly Sins. He plays the perpetual best-friend role to Jimbo’s leading man. He is getting a little tired of it, especially since Jimbo seems to keep blurring the line between theatre and reality, and keeps drunkenly begging Jimothy to be his wingman at every cast party.
Jarmgor Eschatin (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Human 11 7 5 12 10 13. Jarmgor is a member of the Seven Deadly Sins and plays the romantic lead opposite Jimbo. This does not usually require much effort, as she is able to deliver her lines while lying delicately prone in various roles (lover with consumption; whore with a heart of gold and also consumption; spunky recently-divorced socialite with consumption; et cetera). The effort comes in when she has to avoid Jimbo at cast parties. Her preferred strategy is to lie down under the table and hope he doesn’t notice her. It’s worked pretty well so far.
Jarlsberg Erksome (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Human 12 9 8 10 14 10. Jarlsberg is founder, CEO, CFO, COO, president, secretary, treasurer, and playwright of the Seven Deadly Sins as well as owner and proprietor of the Straight Down, Sila’s finest (according to him) dive bar. Jarlsberg is an up-and-coming entrepreneur type. A real Swell Guy. Knows his stuff. Knows the biz. What biz? There’s only one biz, darling. Smile. Chin up. Fix that makeup. Pearly whites. When Jarlsberg isn’t promoting his signature drink (the 3d6 at the Straight Down), he’s tossing around ideas for his future entertainment-lifestyle syndicate.
Jämës Ëlçömbë (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Human 10 9 11 4 7 7. Jämës is a member of the Seven Deadly Sins. He plays the role of the scheming, moustachioed villain (although his moustache is starting to become a little threadbare and probably needs another round of glue to make it stay on). Most people would become tired of playing the Big Bad all the time; Jämës, however, relishes it. It means he gets to stay alive till the end of the show, every single time.
Jàmès Miñor (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Human 10 12 8 8 7 9. Jàmès is a member of the Seven Deadly Sins. He is the Igor to Jämës’ Victor and also has a moustache, though it is somehow in a state of even greater disrepair. Jàmès also relishes playing the villain, except for that one time he unexpectedly died in the middle of the second act. He still hasn’t forgiven Jarlsberg for that one and has since written into his contract that all subsequent deaths must take place in the third act or later.
Bob the Repetitive (Raevori/Finnigan’s voyage, written by James M, Oct. 2016) – Human 6 10 12 6 10 12. Bob doesn’t know why people call him repetitive, and complains about it at length every day to his fellow dock-workers. He’s gotten into a few scuffles over it because it’s that annoying.
Ezekiel Smith (Rock’s voyage, written by James M, Dec 2016) – Human 11 15 7 11 5 6, LE. Ezekiel comes from a long line of angelically blessed paladins, clerics, mayors, burghers, etc, but the blood has thinned in his branch of the family (due to his grandfather’s cowardice at the Battle of Endless Noon, say the second cousins), leaving him only with a grace that surprises some, coming as it does from his scrawny frame. He came to Silanya in the service of Robert Blackhall, hoping to break with his lineage decisively by serving a minion from Hell, and is finding to his horror that his tiefling master is every bit as cloying as his high and mighty relatives. He works in Robert Blackhall’s timber business, and is trying to decide whether sabotaging it is worth the effort.
Samantha the Generic (Leshanna’s voyage, written by James M, May 2016) – Human 11 10 11 10 10 9. Samantha is on the verge of developing a hobby, but hasn’t decided what it will be yet. In the meantime, she carries things around town. Still unable to settle on a hobby after 8 months, Samantha almost made new-year’s resolutions, but was distracted by a really cute squirrel, who she has decided is her friend now.
Thedel Swarts (Morgan Wheeler and Tabitha Loress’ voyage, written by James M, July 2017) – Rock Gnome 11 3 16 10 13 6, NE. Thedel Schwarts is a lowly stone quarrier, mining rocks for housing construction, probably because rocks don’t break when you drop them. And Thedel drops everything. They are the clumsiest being in Sila, by a country mile, but they have plans. Oh yes, they have plans. One day soon, they’ll overthrow that simpering, shining mayor Adel and rule this town with an iron fist. Yes. One day – ow! Dammit. Right on my good foot. Again.
Jean-Martin Bureau de la Chat en Nuit Provences Devaux (Oscar Meyers’ voyage, written by James M, Aug. 2017) – Hill Dwarf 14 5 10 8 14 12, LG. Jean-Martin was always an outdoorsy dwarf. When he heard about a strange new land with all sorts of trees to gambol in, he signed right up, and is happy as a clam labouring in Robert Blackhall’s timber business, hauling trees and trimming fallen ones (he isn’t trusted to fell a tree himself after The Incident).
Pat Depther (Caoimhe’s voyage, written by James M, Aug. 2017) – Human 13 8 4 7 11 12, CN, Dugeon Delver feat. Pat comes from a long line of dungeon delvers and intrepid adventurers, and came to Silanya to get away from their family before they were forced to join the family business (something which would have resulted in them having a short career that ended on the first trap they didn’t notice, what with their fragile health). They send letters home every so often implying they were involved in this or that less well known expedition (ham-fistedly written), but there’s no way they’re going out over the Wall. Instead, they are the baker’s assistant, braving the sweltering heat to carry loaves out to the shop front – assuming they don’t faint along the way. Oops – down they go again.
Bunyip Tweedlebottom (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) Rock gnome 13 9 11 10 9 11, LG. Rock gnome. Bunyip Tweedlebottom comes from a long line of urban gnomish chimney sweeps (or at least, that’s the story his father told him about where the family name came from, and seeing as grandpa and grandma and aunt Jerome and uncle Fizzok all died in a freak chimney collapse before he was born, he’s inclined to believe it), and he is eager to carry on his family craft here in the frenetically growing town of Sila. Although there aren’t many chimneys worthy of the name yet, he keeps busy by stamping out camp fires, lighting torches, and carrying coal.
Fiona Plainsley (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) – Human (featless) 15 10 12 7 12 9, NG. Fiona is the nightsoil porter of Sila, tasked with cleaning up after the various animals that roam the streets by sweeping their excrement into the nearest sewer drain. In her spare time (after she cleans up, and unlike some she cleans up well), she arm-wrestles others in the laborer-class, racking up wins and marveling at some of the weaklings who’ve been gifted with supernatural powers by the presumably wise gods. Unless some of the dark mutterers, she takes it as a reminder that strength isn’t the be all and end all of a person, and she’s quick to remind people getting into a classic Raevori/JP/Quincy cagematch argument that it’s Sovan, not any of those three, that really runs the guild, so you catch more power with smiles than with sinew.
Clarence the Cabbage Seller (Flora’s husband, Nov. 2016, written by Del) – Forest gnome 8 7 6 10 7 9. A humble cabbage seller by trade on the mainland, he hoped that the soil in Silanya would prove more fertile to cabbages and he could become a more successful cabbage seller. The soil in Silanya is inimical to cabbages, and now he labours over a poor crop, unable to afford a trip home.
Steve the Farmer (Leshanna’s voyage, May 2016, written by James M) – Human 13 7 12 5 10 8. A stout tiller of the soil, harvester of grains. Thick as a brick, but dependable. His rye farm is coming along well, succeeding despite the harsh soil. He has also recently gotten engaged to lovely lady who’s a private in the local army detachment! (Jan 2017)
Tim the Cocksure (Raevori/Finnigan’s voyage, written by James M, Oct. 2016) – Halfling 7 14 8 12 8 9. Tim is the greatest thief in town, and is so confident of his status that he doesn’t feel the need to nick anything to prove it. While preemptively laying low, he takes care of a small herd of cows. His cover is so solid nothing else interesting has happened to him yet.
Ashar (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Earth Genasi 14 13 10 6 11 8. Ashar loves farming potatoes so much she would plant herself in the soil with them if she could. She composes couplets for her potatoes. So far the potatoes are the only ones who appreciate them. Her latest couplet went as follows: “Potatoes, soil, dirt and sun / For me you are the only ones”. Ashar is the proud inventor of the game Throwing Potato Sacks, which involves throwing potato sacks. She guards this idea almost as jealously as she guards her potatoes, and is planning on registering the rights with Calliope as soon as she has the gold to pay Calliope for more than six minutes of her time.
Jack Tinner — (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) featless Human 10 4 16 9 5 16 CE.
Jack never got along well with other folks. What with the mockery for his (it feels like) five left feet, combined with the tendency for new found friends (and there seems to be an endless stream of them, if he doesn’t avoid people) to turn on a dime and start screaming at him for things that were never clear before hand, he’s starting to think he’s been cursed by some cruel god named Koman Sants, since that’s what people always invoke mid-shouting. Starting fresh in Silanya, he’s content to be a potato farmer, or rather, he would be, if the ground here were just a bit more stable. Eating dirt several times an hour is starting to kindle something ugly, deep inside him.
Derra Instrain (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) – Half-elf 7 13 9 12 8 16, CG. Derra is a blueberry farmer, tending to a hardscrabble farm in a tiny patch of marsh near the Leshanna Memorial Fund’s rapidly expanding campus north of town. While she isn’t very successful yet, she’s keeping at it, and she’s already made friends with the shore fisherfolk and loggers who often pass by her farm, regularly coaxing them in for a warm cup of blueberry tea at the end of the day.
Iraethia Plainsbury (Prem (Lil P) Belzaphir’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – Half-elf 18 8 6 6 12 12, LN. Iraethia hates the water, but the local husbandry operations are so rudimentary that she was assigned as the captain of a small fishing boat (the one that Trystan Xzizzleburd is on, as a matter of fact). Her prodigious strength seems to be enough to deter him from including her in his usual mischief, and in fact he has been quite solicitous, bringing her hot tea when she is sick (which is always). In the mean time, she wrestles sodden nets and hauling in massive fish using sinew lines, praying to not fall into the water, and to be delivered from the constant series of colds that afflict her.
Iris Katsle (Rock’s voyage, written by James M, Dec 2016) – Human 14 12 6 15 11 12, CN, feat (Magic Initiate [Warlock]). Iris was always a clever girl. She spent her limited days of schooling running rings around her peers, and even got the chance to attend a boarding school at a nearby town for a year, but her parents’ limited means meant that becoming a wizard was never on the table. She’s recently acquired magical powers by a different means, gaining the limited patronage of Kurthanicus, the fey lord whom Ezra and Katan Argent serve. Day to day, she works as a fisher.
Quiet Bill (Melora’s voyage, Nov 2016, written by James M) – Human 13 11 12 11 16 6, N*. A recent addition to the large labor force of fisherfolk who provide much of Sila’s food supply (much of the soil is poor behind the wall, and it’s hard to determine which crops will grow well without trial and error), Quiet Bill is a hard nut to crack. He’s reserved past the point of good manners, to the point where he dampens conversation in any group that he’s standing in. The few who have coaxed a few words out of him have noted his keen observation skills, and several have profited from a handful of words of life advice from him.
Trystan Xzizzleburd (Aa’li’naa Aurae’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – Tiefling 10 9 11 7 8 9, LE. Trystan is a mischief-maker of dark intent, delighting in subtly manipulating affairs to bring misery to those around him so he can rise in prominence. Or, at least, that’s how he thinks of himself. To those around him on the small fishing vessel that he labours on, he is a transparent, cruel, vindictive person, whose dangerous predilections are held in check by his rank incompetence. He is stuck as the tackle-man (the most dangerous job) on a 4 crew boat, and will be for the indefinite future if his crew mates have anything to say about it.
Promontor (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Triton 13 11 12 8 8 15. From an early age, Promontor was groomed for the family business of shrimp-fishing. He was happy to take over his mother’s enterprise until one day, his older brother Shabbasane walked in on Promontor canoodling with Shabbasane’s betrothed. Cast out in shame, Promontor set swim alongside the next ship bound for Silanya, communing with the shrimp to carry him along with thousands of their tiny bodies. He now spends his days lamenting his sorrows to the shrimp before he nets them, flexing his dripping wet muscles in the sunlight, and entangling himself in various extramarital affairs.
Steve the Fisher (Oscar Meyers’ voyage, written by James M, Aug. 2017) – Human 14 9 9 11 13 12, N. No relation to Steve the Farmer. Steve is a shoreline fisherman, a doughty wader in the muck, catcher of small fish in hand-thrown nets. He’s passable at it, despite occasional face-plants in the mud or the periodic contraction of a savage cold.
Cloud on the Mountaintop (Oscar Meyers’ voyage, written by James M, Aug. 2017) – Tabaxi 12 13 13 12 10 10, CG. The Tabaxi were one of the races native to what is now the mainland before the Exodus, and their relationship with the newcomers is…complicated. Cloud on the Mountaintop was sent by his tribe to see what the old land that the city-builders is like, and resents the restrictions that confine him inside the Wall. While he bides his time, waiting for the day he can explore this land that is truly new to his people, he fishes along the shoreline, trading a portion of his catch for metal disks that he is told have value.
Brent Hickensen (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) – Human (Tough) 10 13 10 11 7 12, CE. Brent is the toughest fisherman hereabouts, and every knows it. He’s so tough, he’ll let his crew go out into storms without him. So tough, he can make people flinch if he punches them in the stomach. So tough, he’s got a handful of unusually weak people very scared of him. So tough, he’s be running this town one…oh shit is that an adventurer. Shaddup! Be cool, be cool.
Criminals / Ne’er-do-wells
Babette Heloise au Couronne-sur-Mer de la Petite Contumace Frere-Caderousse (Syathir and Saoirse’s voyage, January 2017) – CN Hill Dwarf (10 9 13 6 14 7) is a Lay Sister of the Order of Our Lady of Perpetual Suffering. This small and controversial sect believes in the utterly pointless mortification of the flesh and spirit as a sign of devotion to the Next Life. (Their former identity was as a murderous Death Cult; since a solemn pledge included in the Articles of the Third Treaty of Holmsburgh to only practice their beliefs on themselves, they have provisionally been granted protected religious status.) The Sufferers (as they are known) have been overwhelming Home with requests to emigrate to Sila, which to them seems a Paradise of suffering and terror. Babette is the first lucky soul picked. She lurks around the adventurer sorts trying to cajole one into taking her deep into the wilds and abandoning her to the sweet, sweet consummation of her religious need to be treated terribly and die alone in the woods. Somehow her intense, bug-eyed need to die under terrible circumstances has not been a selling point to potential Zealot-smugglers, but she lives in hope. Of losing all hope. You know. Religion, eh?
Olivia Blueteeth (Prem (Lil P) Belzaphir’s voyage, written by James M, Jan 2017) – Human 11 10 8 10 9 11, CE. Olivia may just be a pipsqueak fresh outta training, but she’s also the first line of attack by the feared (according to them) Blueteeth gang. She’s scoping out the town, trying to work out the lay of the land and current gang structure before sending word home, and she’s going to use all of her cunning gained in 15 years on the world to do it.
Pat Kathold (Ryan K’s second character and Basil’s voyage, written by James M, November 2017) – Human (Ritual caster: Unseen Servant and Detect Magic) 15 7 10 9 11 10, CG. Pat is an independently wealthy only child of a highly successful merchant, currently living at the Straight Down. A committed anarchist, they’ve seen the corruption in the system and are going to tear it all down, man. The Establishment just protects itself. It’s just a bunch of rich people fucking eachother on piles of money. My dad hired a therapist to get me to stop talking about it, but I saw. I saw how shitty the whole thing was that one time my parents thought I had gone to school. We can build a better world, friend. I’ve already broken out of the third-person voice, now together we can seize control of the magical means of production. Utopia will be built on the backs of my unseen servants. The revolution will not be heralded by bards, because they’re in on it too. Trust no-one but the real people. gesture that indicates fealty to the memory of a long-dead mass murderer whose legacy has been misunderstood as a fight for freedom, and whose bearded face and flowing locks adorn the shirt Pat is currently wearing Hope never dies. Onwards!
Orville Twinklebottom (Syathir and Saoirse’s voyage, January 2017) – CG Rock Gnome (3 13 14 13 13 11 – Orville had it all figured out. He was going to use his unusual Gnome strength to become a minor adventurer – maybe a spear carrier, or a sidekick, or a man-at-arms – until he had enough money to reopen his uncle’s beloved chocolate factory, Twinklebottom Grotto, by paying off the creditors. Then he set one foot on shore and contracted a wasting disease from a lowlife in a dockside tavern, where his muscles apparently boiled away. The newly hapless Orville now faces an extended bed rest and the certain knowledge that he will never use a sword again – or possibly even a pen. All of his angry letters to Fior asking for compensation have had to be dictated to his patient nurses at the Empire Memorial Long-Term Care Facility for the Permanently Injured near Guild HQ. He has yet to hear any response. This is, perhaps, due at least in part to his refusal to speak to Fior in person on her repeated visits, or to dictate his letters in any language other than Old Gnomish. Attempts to explain this to Orville have been very limited in their success, and accompanied by a rain of hostile (but very, very soft) blows with his (very light) cane.
Emmaline L’Heureuse du Montpassier (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Dwarf 13 9 11 7 14 10. Emmaline and her friend Ronabak were freed from a slaver’s ring on the mainland by a certain sharp-tongued, purple-haired dwarf. Emmaline doesn’t have a mom or dad left and doesn’t particularly want to go back to live with her grandmother who sold her to the mean men in the first place. She heard that the dwarf who freed her decided to go to Silanya. She thought it might be a nice idea. She likes her adopted mom Flora, her friend Ronabak, boats, and math class, in that order.
Ronabak (Valerian/Marc’s voyage, February 2017) – Half-Orc 12 10 11 9 8 8. Ronabak and his friend Emmaline were freed from a slaver’s ring on the mainland by a certain sharp-tongued, purple-haired dwarf. Ronabak is having some problems adjusting to life in Silanya, but he couldn’t just leave his friend Emmaline to come over all by herself. It’s not that he cares about her, it’s more that she’s so small she’d get lost or something if she weren’t careful. Ronabak is currently giving Flora and Clarence a difficult time what with his tendency to stomp up to his room and slam his door approximately six times a day, but they remain patient with him even they don’t understand him AT ALL and they’re not even his REAL parents.